Active listening

Hi everyone! The blogs I write is all about the key learnings I learnt from each day! Hope you enjoy it!

“Listen before you speak

And keep your mind empty while listening to others.”

Listen before you speak

So, we all have read somewhere saying listening is one of the top skills that you'll need in 2020 and beyond. THE MOST SOUGHT AFTER SKILL!

But are we doing so?

Yesterday, my mom asked me to do a chore. Yes, of course, I listened but, if you ask me if I did listen actively, the answer is no. I got what she asked me to do but unfortunately, I forget it simultaneous. My mind failed to register what she said. Like always, one ear grabs the information and, it went out through the other ear. I completely forgot what she asked me.

It wasn’t the first time and yeah, I can provide you with countless other examples but wait do I remember them all? It’s the topic for another day.

One day, My grandma asked me to give the money to my mom. Yeah, I placed it securely in the purse. But when my mom asked about it, I completely forgot the fact that I placed the money in the purse. You know, I got plenty of scold for being irresponsible. But what’s happening?

Like I’m not speaking but my mind does. It speaks many thoughts so that I can’t concentrate on what others speaking.

Some people may find it difficult to not speak when others speak, they like to express their thought so quick so that they feel at ease but it’s wrong. Listen to other even they are wrong and tell what you feel at the end!

And keep your mind empty while listening to others

In this era of information overload and distractions at its peak, it’s hard to focus just on a single thing. Our minds do most of our tasks without letting our conscious fully aware of what we are doing.

We keep on thinking about how many likes we got on Instagram and what all the tasks that I should complete today etc., etc., Our mind doesn’t give us a second to empty our thoughts.

Why can’t we empty it? There are remedies like mindfulness, meditation, yoga and exercise to keep yourself focused and organised and there’s another villain here to distract you. Not exactly distracting, it makes decision without our approval and it is SUB-CONCIOUSNESS!

Remember the times of you riding bike, brushing teeth, or tying shoes. These are automatic tasks that can be done without much thought in the process. We may struggle during our learning period but, eventually, it all comes in handy so that we don’t even recognize what we did.

For example, here’s a test for you, tell me which leg did you first put on while climbing stairs? What’s the point in remembering these you may ask!

Our brain goes on autopilot most of the time when we do mundane tasks. We may also think about various scenarios while we do these kinds of tasks, and that too without much attention. Beware If we focus more on balancing ourselves on stairs, we may fall.

We must keep our thoughts in check to avoid the rush of emotions and to hear what the other person is trying to say. The communication is unfulfilled while we give control to the unconscious mind to roam. I hope next time when you do these tasks, do it consciously. Don’t multitask.

The bonus is you feel at present. Do you remember the live in the moment theory? You will feel that :)

P.S. I’m not saying, to not let your unconscious mind do the things. I love the unconscious mind because I put on my earphones and blast the music while doing the dishes because it let me do my least exciting chore without much effort. I’m just trying to convey that keep these things in check and don’t let most of your life in auto-pilot.

Bye! Meet you in next post!